My thoughts unconsciously swim around in my head with an unnerving alertness. My eyes are heavy and my brain feels numb. I breathe, write, pray, listen to music but the sirens don’t shut off.

I wish I still had my sleep tonic spoon fed by my beloved. The hand that aids me in my console now isn’t as kind or practical. I’m on until it’s gone and I find the strength within to resign to the pure bliss of falling in love again.

This time my story is going to look very different and my songs, breath, prayers and words will be acknowledged in a way that continues to lift my spirit and help me become one.

I’ll lay my head down to rest and easily drift to dreams. I won’t have to be on.

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